Blog: grown-up kids

Why you never have time and what to do about it

2019-08-17 by Sasha Kovaliov

In the series of posts titled Grown-up Kids, I'm exploring the qualities and specific world-view we had, when we were children. And how we can re-introduce these patterns into our lives again and rewire our brains to be more open, more present and whole.

A couple of months ago I had a meeting with my friend. We've known each other for years, so I didn't expect her to be on time. However, she came right on the dot to my surprise. She was panting, sweating and clearly in distress. When I asked her what happened, she told me she was so afraid to be late for our meeting that she had to run to my place, as she had missed her bus.

That made me feel awful. I was responsible for her distress and fear. I built certain expectations around time and caused harm to a person I love because of it 😟

I have been feeling anxiety around time for years! Everyone knows that I'm very punctual and never late. Everyone also knows how much I hate when someone is late and how upset I can get.

So, I got curious about the roots of my relationship with time. Was it possible to be more carefree with my own perspective on time and gentler towards others?

Good news, everyone! Yes, it's possible and what's even more important, it feels damn freeing.

Let's dive into it. We are going to explore how our time perception has changed since we were kids, what modern physics thinks about time in comparison to spirituality, and how you can reframe your own thinking.

Be curious and ask more questions

2019-08-09 by Sasha Kovaliov

Photo by Joseph Rosales on Unsplash

Remember when you were a kid, you would wake up super early and most likely annoy your parents right away? Remember how easy it was to get out of bed in the morning? How you were not anxiously thinking about what's gonna happen today, but instead, you were ready to go out and explore? How you were curious about the most unremarkable, like seeing a ridiculously small dog or intrigued by the smells of book pages?

I didn't remember any of that till recently. If you told me to think about it, I'd most likely dismiss your idea right away and say something cynical in my self defense, like "but can children eat cake for breakfast?".

For years, every morning would be on autopilot for me: wake up, reach for the phone, scroll through feeds absentmindedly, and in about 20 minutes crawl out of bed.

Brush my teeth, take a shower, make coffee, watch 20-30 minutes of YouTube, get dressed and get to work.

Clap if it sounds familiar. Go ahead, 🙌🙌🙌.